![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Maybe it wasn't the best time to start something as near a diet as no matter. And all I do is eat lesser portions of food;l nothing's forbidden.
Oh, and no carb-binging at night.
Yesterday, I sat there at work, feeling like shite generally (even before those couple of screw-ups started happening to me and the others), and thought: I've been self-medicating with food for the last 20 f*cking years - that's why I'm at this higher but very stable for a long time setpoint. I've been self-medicating (eating for serotonin, etc) and now that I'm not...I feel like shite. I'm coming out of my 'food-fog'...and now I get to re-meet the real me - an irritably-angry Crank. There's a reason people settle at various, higher weights - and they eat pretty much exactly enough on an ongoing basis to maintain that specific setpoint.
No, I'm not using that as an excuse to relapse.
Just an observation.
F*ck, I hope I pull out of this enough for Gally weekend. I really don't need to be sitting around as the weekend's official killjoy, feeling like a f*cking always-on-the-edge-of-tears zombie with cotton-wool head.
Oh, and no carb-binging at night.
Yesterday, I sat there at work, feeling like shite generally (even before those couple of screw-ups started happening to me and the others), and thought: I've been self-medicating with food for the last 20 f*cking years - that's why I'm at this higher but very stable for a long time setpoint. I've been self-medicating (eating for serotonin, etc) and now that I'm not...I feel like shite. I'm coming out of my 'food-fog'...and now I get to re-meet the real me - an irritably-angry Crank. There's a reason people settle at various, higher weights - and they eat pretty much exactly enough on an ongoing basis to maintain that specific setpoint.
No, I'm not using that as an excuse to relapse.
Just an observation.
F*ck, I hope I pull out of this enough for Gally weekend. I really don't need to be sitting around as the weekend's official killjoy, feeling like a f*cking always-on-the-edge-of-tears zombie with cotton-wool head.