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Busy night - real mish-mash.
I do recall, hanging out in an interior with a local friend (former co-worker) and her 'father' (who is no longer alive). Because of things I'd heard about him, I was wary of him - ie, didn't want to antagonize him. To the point of being anxious enough to worry about possibly annoying him. At another moment, the friend seemed to turn into another friend, my best chum from college (the same cautions regarding the 'father' applied, although this friend hadn't had that type of father), although I felt slightly more reassured by her as I've known her longer. I'd been cooking or baking pork/bacon, but a very fatty cut, and wound up with a mixture of very crisp bits (texture like chips), to puffed but still fairly dry pieces (like pork rinds), to regular more meat-like pieces. I got worried that he'd be annoyed about the way they'd come out, or that I'd cooked them (and not chicken, etc). Or else he'd be annoyed if I didn't put them away promptly. He'd gone out to do an errand, and I hope he'd not be pissed off.
I also spent some time examining a 'bathroom cabinet' - which seemed to have a bunch of toiletries and accessories (like jewelry) in it...except that it seemed to have many 'pages' - could be leafed through like a book, but the 'page' you were on would be a complete 3D shelf crammed with stuff. I looked at it and leafed though a bit, but again, chary of, for example, leaving it on the 'wrong' leaf/shelf so that the father might be pissed off by that when he came home. One of the 'shelves' was crammed with jewelry; I knocked something over and tried to right it and turn the pages back to where I'd found it.
(You seeing a theme, here? Scary male authority figures who must be appeased - they haven't gone apesh*t on you, but you don't dare let that happen - this was not a feature of my childhood or current reality, for that matter, that 'Everything will be ok if you just don't piss him off' walking on eggshells. So why is this featuring in my psyche now? (Unless I really am one of those hyper-sensitive types who got traumatized by a few annoyed looks from my parents when I was teeny-tiny...in which case I'll be up front with you - I'd feel like a Loser with a capital L for being such a delicate Flower).
-----
Not sure if this next bit was a continuation of earlier or a new scenario (I suspect the former, as while the location seemed to change, there was still this idea that there was a male authority 'around' whom I really wanted to stay on the good side of).
I was on public transportation out to JP (former neighborhood I lived in while in Boston), could have been a trolly or bus, when I became aware of cats having snuck onto the bus, as I saw a couple hanging around the front of the bus where I was waiting to get off. I encouraged/called them off the bus, and found myself leading four (!) with me back to the residence I was staying in (wasn't clear if permanent or temporary residence). They kept up with me pretty well (being cats and all) as we were walking across this green park-like area.
While heading to the place my awareness of the cats following faded away (or else I proceeded to the place another time as well, sans cats, but this time, accompanied by a large group of females, some of whom gave off a jovial or mischevious impression.) In that place, which may have been a 'dorm', I interacted with some of the denizens (both genders). At one end of the building were some 'dorm rooms', which had varied and creative doorways (impression that it was a one-piece purchaseable covering), which I let a couple of fellow residents know I admired. I said something about envying them as we couldn't do that when I was in undergrad, maybe. Something to that effect. One of them (male) seemed pleased or amused by my declaration.
I definitely moved around the building a bit. At one point, some guy told me that someone (someone I regarded as a male authority figure, of course!) had been (incorrectly) told that I'd almost started a fire in the building, but it turned out it was another guy who had dome so (by leaving incense buring in his room). I was irate at hearing this, due to (again) not wanting to be in trouble with any authority figures, but also relieved that they now knew it wasn't me. I, however, might have been planning to go make 100% sure my name had been 'cleared' with the authority figure.
No EE meditation
No biphasic sleep
I do recall, hanging out in an interior with a local friend (former co-worker) and her 'father' (who is no longer alive). Because of things I'd heard about him, I was wary of him - ie, didn't want to antagonize him. To the point of being anxious enough to worry about possibly annoying him. At another moment, the friend seemed to turn into another friend, my best chum from college (the same cautions regarding the 'father' applied, although this friend hadn't had that type of father), although I felt slightly more reassured by her as I've known her longer. I'd been cooking or baking pork/bacon, but a very fatty cut, and wound up with a mixture of very crisp bits (texture like chips), to puffed but still fairly dry pieces (like pork rinds), to regular more meat-like pieces. I got worried that he'd be annoyed about the way they'd come out, or that I'd cooked them (and not chicken, etc). Or else he'd be annoyed if I didn't put them away promptly. He'd gone out to do an errand, and I hope he'd not be pissed off.
I also spent some time examining a 'bathroom cabinet' - which seemed to have a bunch of toiletries and accessories (like jewelry) in it...except that it seemed to have many 'pages' - could be leafed through like a book, but the 'page' you were on would be a complete 3D shelf crammed with stuff. I looked at it and leafed though a bit, but again, chary of, for example, leaving it on the 'wrong' leaf/shelf so that the father might be pissed off by that when he came home. One of the 'shelves' was crammed with jewelry; I knocked something over and tried to right it and turn the pages back to where I'd found it.
(You seeing a theme, here? Scary male authority figures who must be appeased - they haven't gone apesh*t on you, but you don't dare let that happen - this was not a feature of my childhood or current reality, for that matter, that 'Everything will be ok if you just don't piss him off' walking on eggshells. So why is this featuring in my psyche now? (Unless I really am one of those hyper-sensitive types who got traumatized by a few annoyed looks from my parents when I was teeny-tiny...in which case I'll be up front with you - I'd feel like a Loser with a capital L for being such a delicate Flower).
-----
Not sure if this next bit was a continuation of earlier or a new scenario (I suspect the former, as while the location seemed to change, there was still this idea that there was a male authority 'around' whom I really wanted to stay on the good side of).
I was on public transportation out to JP (former neighborhood I lived in while in Boston), could have been a trolly or bus, when I became aware of cats having snuck onto the bus, as I saw a couple hanging around the front of the bus where I was waiting to get off. I encouraged/called them off the bus, and found myself leading four (!) with me back to the residence I was staying in (wasn't clear if permanent or temporary residence). They kept up with me pretty well (being cats and all) as we were walking across this green park-like area.
While heading to the place my awareness of the cats following faded away (or else I proceeded to the place another time as well, sans cats, but this time, accompanied by a large group of females, some of whom gave off a jovial or mischevious impression.) In that place, which may have been a 'dorm', I interacted with some of the denizens (both genders). At one end of the building were some 'dorm rooms', which had varied and creative doorways (impression that it was a one-piece purchaseable covering), which I let a couple of fellow residents know I admired. I said something about envying them as we couldn't do that when I was in undergrad, maybe. Something to that effect. One of them (male) seemed pleased or amused by my declaration.
I definitely moved around the building a bit. At one point, some guy told me that someone (someone I regarded as a male authority figure, of course!) had been (incorrectly) told that I'd almost started a fire in the building, but it turned out it was another guy who had dome so (by leaving incense buring in his room). I was irate at hearing this, due to (again) not wanting to be in trouble with any authority figures, but also relieved that they now knew it wasn't me. I, however, might have been planning to go make 100% sure my name had been 'cleared' with the authority figure.
No EE meditation
No biphasic sleep