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Big mish-mash of scenes.
Found mysef in a 'lab'; puttered around anxiously, feeling my usual combo of Angst and Self-castigation. When I feel I'm in a 'lab', I start assuming I work there, and I must be there to feed cells, etc... If I can't find any to feed, or can't find any bottles of media (like last night), I get anxious, berating myself inwardly that obviously I'm Not Doing My Job; the fully-mixed media's run out. (Cell culture cells don't have to be necessarily be fed every day, but they do have to be fed several times a week.) All I can think is 'When was the last time I fed the cells? Are they still alive? Why don't I know what's going on?' So last night I was poking around; decided we'd run out of media, but hesitated to find someone to ask about where the raw supplies were, as that would be Tipping Them Off that I was inattentive and obviously Not Doing My Job. While trying to figure it out myself, I wandered into a nearby area that seemed more modern and newer (whiter decor) and decided it was space (work benches) reserved for a company who had leased that space (just, there was no one in there working that day).
Went for a wander in what I thought at the time was the school I work in; some female companion led me into a 'new' area where the general public couldn't go yet, which I was given the impression was a 'new floor' for the library. It had this 'almost completely finished' look or impression. I saw a little office area for a graphic designer (that you had to climb up a wee little ladder to access), and spent a few moments thinking to myself I wish I had the skill set to do that sort of stuff. Then I noticed this area that had a big thick yellow liquidy stain on the floor (reminded me of orange juice - the type with the pulp bits in it) and circled 'round to see if I could figure out where it came from. Someone else appeared; fortunately we weren't scolded for (possibly) being in a restricted area. She explained that the leak had come from a container, possibly in what was a fridge type of unit. That a container in there had leaked. As she told me that, I seemed to see it (see the vessel through something else?) though why it hadn't yet been cleaned up if they knew about it I don't know. Also, doesn't sound much like a library now, does it?
Yet another scenario had me driving (apparently alone) in a vehicle - I remember curving cloverleaf-style stretches of road, as if transferring to another route. At one point, I fell out of the car (yet not hurt by that; perhaps not going very fast), and began to freak, running after it, as it kept going for a bit along the curving track, as I assumed a crack-up would happen, but hoping somehow against hope that I could catch up with it and no one would notice what I'd done. Which I actually was able to do (whether it wasn't going that fast, whether someone else intefered with it, or whether I was just reallyreally Lucky, I don't know). But it fetched a bit up against a large tree, and hadn't been fast enough to cause damage. I got inside again (it was roomier than a typical car) and one or two people suddenly appeared, bearing a chair that one said was a replacement; supposed to be in there. To me, this was the equivalent of narrowly escaping a collision accident due to being a clumsy or irresponsible driver, whereapon a mechanic cheerfully shows up to drop off part of your car that had needed repair (because mechanics always do that). In other words, someone totally knew what had happened, but there may have been a deliberate attempt to check on/reassure me.
Was in an interior, hanging around with a few people. One guy (felt older or more knowledgable) seemed to be regaling some of the other people with something Doctor-Who related (either an episode, or an event where the Doctor was). One of the other folks asked about what really funny stuff or comments were said; the other fellow mentioned something, and I internally agreed, then tried to contribute to the conversation, but realized I couldn't quite recall (what I had been going to add). I seemed to have some machine playing some music (low, possibly Star Wars music), but I started to worry/realize that I was being a tad Rude (since there was a conversation going on).
So, ongoing anxiety Themes: 'I'm an Irresponsible Worker/Irresponsible Driver/Rude Person'
No EE meditation
No biphasic sleep
Definitely low blood sugar sleep
Found mysef in a 'lab'; puttered around anxiously, feeling my usual combo of Angst and Self-castigation. When I feel I'm in a 'lab', I start assuming I work there, and I must be there to feed cells, etc... If I can't find any to feed, or can't find any bottles of media (like last night), I get anxious, berating myself inwardly that obviously I'm Not Doing My Job; the fully-mixed media's run out. (Cell culture cells don't have to be necessarily be fed every day, but they do have to be fed several times a week.) All I can think is 'When was the last time I fed the cells? Are they still alive? Why don't I know what's going on?' So last night I was poking around; decided we'd run out of media, but hesitated to find someone to ask about where the raw supplies were, as that would be Tipping Them Off that I was inattentive and obviously Not Doing My Job. While trying to figure it out myself, I wandered into a nearby area that seemed more modern and newer (whiter decor) and decided it was space (work benches) reserved for a company who had leased that space (just, there was no one in there working that day).
Went for a wander in what I thought at the time was the school I work in; some female companion led me into a 'new' area where the general public couldn't go yet, which I was given the impression was a 'new floor' for the library. It had this 'almost completely finished' look or impression. I saw a little office area for a graphic designer (that you had to climb up a wee little ladder to access), and spent a few moments thinking to myself I wish I had the skill set to do that sort of stuff. Then I noticed this area that had a big thick yellow liquidy stain on the floor (reminded me of orange juice - the type with the pulp bits in it) and circled 'round to see if I could figure out where it came from. Someone else appeared; fortunately we weren't scolded for (possibly) being in a restricted area. She explained that the leak had come from a container, possibly in what was a fridge type of unit. That a container in there had leaked. As she told me that, I seemed to see it (see the vessel through something else?) though why it hadn't yet been cleaned up if they knew about it I don't know. Also, doesn't sound much like a library now, does it?
Yet another scenario had me driving (apparently alone) in a vehicle - I remember curving cloverleaf-style stretches of road, as if transferring to another route. At one point, I fell out of the car (yet not hurt by that; perhaps not going very fast), and began to freak, running after it, as it kept going for a bit along the curving track, as I assumed a crack-up would happen, but hoping somehow against hope that I could catch up with it and no one would notice what I'd done. Which I actually was able to do (whether it wasn't going that fast, whether someone else intefered with it, or whether I was just reallyreally Lucky, I don't know). But it fetched a bit up against a large tree, and hadn't been fast enough to cause damage. I got inside again (it was roomier than a typical car) and one or two people suddenly appeared, bearing a chair that one said was a replacement; supposed to be in there. To me, this was the equivalent of narrowly escaping a collision accident due to being a clumsy or irresponsible driver, whereapon a mechanic cheerfully shows up to drop off part of your car that had needed repair (because mechanics always do that). In other words, someone totally knew what had happened, but there may have been a deliberate attempt to check on/reassure me.
Was in an interior, hanging around with a few people. One guy (felt older or more knowledgable) seemed to be regaling some of the other people with something Doctor-Who related (either an episode, or an event where the Doctor was). One of the other folks asked about what really funny stuff or comments were said; the other fellow mentioned something, and I internally agreed, then tried to contribute to the conversation, but realized I couldn't quite recall (what I had been going to add). I seemed to have some machine playing some music (low, possibly Star Wars music), but I started to worry/realize that I was being a tad Rude (since there was a conversation going on).
So, ongoing anxiety Themes: 'I'm an Irresponsible Worker/Irresponsible Driver/Rude Person'
No EE meditation
No biphasic sleep
Definitely low blood sugar sleep