Site of the Day

"RV is primarily self-exploration. The universe is holographic. The target is you.

"It is you when it's a serial killer or a saint, when it's a rollercoaster or a plane crash, when it's a buffalo or a DNA strand or the moon. The data doesn't come in from somewhere else. It doesn't come from 'over there' on some carrier frequency to 'over here' where you try not to drop it. It's inside you. You fork it out of yourself like a spaghetti squash.

"You can't keep data out. It's already here. Thinking of it as NOT already being here can limit your belief-system access to target data in general (particularly time-offset data). You can, however, choose not to perceive it. You already don't perceive all kinds of things about any given target. So you can choose not to perceive what you might think you are "not ready for"."
-PJ Gaenir

Rumination of the Day

What is victim-thinking?

IMO, a simple alternative to active problem-solving at any given moment. We feel unable or unwilling to solve our current issues for whatever reasons...so we fall back on this cognitive habit, intertwined with, an integral subset of depressive/negative cognitive habits in general.

Related is the need for a 'villain(s)' to blame for one's unpleasant emotional milieus. I mean, over and above actual 'causae', either inwardly or outwardly defined. That is...demanding to know 'causes' itself can be seen as a manifestation of this habit.

I know this first-hand: This is a 'bad' cognitive habit I adopted many years ago, and have developed ever since. It is only recently that I've become somewhat aware of it...and started wondering if there might be better alternatives.

I scorn some former friends of mine as stuck in playing a victim-role.

Yet I do the same thing.

(Hence, the at times substantial level of 'upset' and judgement I've felt towards them, as we often detest unliked aspects of ourselves that we see in others.)

I even cast them as one of my life's (recent) 'villains'.

Let's just say that the Irony of that realization (as we for a time felt united against other 'villains') really helped me notice this cognitive habit of mine.

Not that I haven't also done that with others who have 'crossed' me...or 'hurt me' (as I see it).

Thus, the longevity of resentment towards others will be related to this.


In conclusion, I regard victim-thinking as 'bad' due to me considering it to be an impediment to practical problem-solving.

See, I've noticed how when I'm stressed in general, falling into anxiety-driven worrying about various mundane issues...that's, oddly enough, when I find myself 'thinking' (ie, ruminating) about people in the past who 'done me wrong'. Getting worked up, revisiting the past. So, I consider this habit a rather large componant of my own personal procrastination style.

It's because I'm scared to push past some discomforts and get some stuff done...so I fall back on this unproductive 'default'. It's like picking at a scab...time-wasting and somewhat disgusting... but there are still times when it beats pushing past the discomfort. So, when I get in one of those moods...I know I'm avoiding doing something that I am anxious about.

I'm working on making those times fewer and farther between.

Today's NeverBeforeTried Recipe that came out GREAT!!

CHEESY POLENTA!!

Ok, I was reallly hungry by the time it was done, but...was still GREAT!

(I made the polenta but used commercial tomato sauce instead...no Purist, I....;>)